Thats just the way things are…
Its been 11 months since I arrived in Pakistan, and the best phrase I had to describe what I call the ‘Pakistani way’ is just this: “Thats just the way things are…”
It all started with bowling. Area 51, as many who go there will recognize it for its music, sheesha and bowling lanes rather than their impeccable service (which leaves MUCH to be desired) regardless, bad service is not criminal, however, inability to make decisions without consent of the ‘Man in charge’, to me is. I asked for an order of fries, now I like my fries with Masala, and since I picked up the European habit of eating fries with Mayo, I asked for Masala fries and Mayo.
“Well, im sorry sir, that’s not on the menu”
“Yes it is, here, masala fries, and here, mayo fries” I informed the waiter.
“Yes, but sir, which one do you like?”
“Masala and mayo fries please”
“That cannot be done sir, it’s not on the menu” he, now a bit more stern, replied.
What ensued was a brief conversation with the management who then tussled over the ordeal for awhile, and then finally came to apologies that I would have to order two fries.
Now I may be culturally insensitive to asking for such flexibility. The fries meant nothing to me, it was the dialog that I will never forget. Customized orders are a no go, and area 51 isn’t the only place to deny me my masala and mayo fries…
Then it was the garbage artwork that so many fine artists contribute to the cities flourishing and blemished streets. I I was driving along Shar-e-faisal with a friend, who rolls down the window a bit and then tosses a chocolate bar wrapper out the window, astonished, I said that was wrong and he shouldn’t have done such a thing. To which he replied,
“Yea i know its not the best thing to do, but look at it this way, this road is cleaner than most, and that is because many people are hired to clean it. Do you think that if I threw this wrapper away in a garbage can that it would find its way to a landfill?”
“Well, thats the idea isn’t it?”
“Well no, most garbage bags just get tossed on the side of the road anyway, this way if I throw litter on shar-e-faisal, I know at least that the garbage is going to be picked up and put in the right spot.”
An interesting, and all too true excuse for why things are..
Then it was the movie theater. Cineplex Seaview is a great spot to hit once in a season, since that is how often they update their movie selection. Regardless, one day I was particularly feeling homesick, and when i’m in need of an escape I would goto the movies alone and just forget everything for those 90 minutes. This time (approximately 3:00pm on a Friday) I went to the theater. However upon entering, the manager kindly came up and informed me that I could not watch a movie by myself, that this was a family place an if I didn’t have a girlfriend, mother or sister with me, that I wouldn’t be entering. Now I can respect the family policy, last thing any family wants is to go somewhere and have a bunch of immature rowdy men causing ruckus. However on a Friday at 3pm, with not a single other patron in the theater, I was representing that batch of rowdy men. The only solution the manager could come up with was that I enter with another couple, who agrees to accompany me in the elevator up to the theater. After finding a nice young couple that entertained my request, I got to see my film (Movie title was ‘Cursed’, and personally I wouldn’t highly recommend it).
Each case had its good reason for why these policies and methods are in place. So does this make me a vain gora, or is there something inherent in this society that goes unnoticed, and unchecked? A general apathy towards doing anything away from what they are told to do? And sticking to policies, even if they don’t make sense in some situation.
I have many more examples which I may share in later posts regarding this “Thats just the way things are…” series.
Congratulations, you are a vain gora like many others on KMB who seem to have limitless examples of little things that they dont like or notice, of course their adopted ‘dharti maa’ is more incorporated in your brains.
We sir are a country founded just Congratulations, you are a vain gora like many others on KMB who seem to have limitless examples of little things that they dont like or notice, of course their adopted ‘dharti maa’ is more incorporated in your brains.
We sir are a country founded just
what a nerve….fussing on a fries order. Even women bitch less
why must everything boil down to religion. It’s rather exasperating that everything which goes wrong is attributed to the fact that people have deviated from “God’s Holy Path”. If you want to argue your opinion, do it without playing the trump card of religion.
very few people may be aware that every year we in karachi receive a dust/sand storm on the good friday/easter….i have been observing it for the past couple of years….this year it came a little late just this friday evening from 8:oopm pst….any spiritual explaination…???
Oh no iam not kidding…..
http://karachi.metblogs.com/archives/2005/04/of_dust_stark_s.phtml
Your right neoka, this is one fucked up country we got going here, retards in charge, never admit their mistakes and then leave it to some pussies to bring religion into everything, fuck you retard mullah lovers in your fucking ass!
All these comments!!
Yeeesh!!
KMB never fails to amaze.
Commenters, Please chill out — you may not agree with the blogger but he’s just pointing out the differences he’s observed here — since we’ve become so used to them, it seems like his postings may be unnecessary but we should appreciate the observations he makes — it shows what non-locals think and feel about the way things are here.
i agree with rukun completely. 11 months and is this the only thing worth posting? chill out.
@ SMELLY: you want to know why religion has to be brought into everything? Its because its the only form guidance we are blessed with that covers all aspects of life. Why am i saying that? just take religion out of the picture and you’ll realize the only other thing that has influenced our generations of people is media and the western world. You think that it is better than relating to religion?, well think again.
@ MR PROFANITY: dude atleast stop complaining if your sorry ass can’t do anything productive.
@ DAN: My friend I’m sure the OP and all those who think alike are products of the paki heritage. Spending time outside the country and then making comparison just for sake of complaining is pathetic.Goes to show that they never deserved the opportunities they got, more precious resources of the country gone to waste
I wish our young (or any other) generation would be influenced by the west – that way we might have learned honesty, integrity, proper work ethics, social graces and good manners, civic sense and yes, good customer service.
I am so sick of the people here bringing religion into everything – come on people, do you relaly think that non-believers are devoid of all morals good habits? We should not need the ‘danda’ of religion to be simple, good human beings. I generally believe that there is inherent honesty and desire to do good in all humans; hoevr, this belief is slowly getting eroded after spending a few weeks in Pakistan and after reading all these bigoted comments here.
I wish our young (or any other) generation would be influenced by the west – that way we might have learned honesty, integrity, proper work ethics, social graces and good manners, civic sense and yes, good customer service
I agree with you Orignal and instead of adapting the residue of West, our people should follow the things you mentioned above but can you enlighten me how did West learn all these things? What was the source? I have been waiting to communicate with a single Israelite who claims that religion didn’t motivate him to move forward. *Spielberg*
@ Rukin
Don’t blame the western world for everything. The sad thing is that we can only see what is different from us. Their values are different, it dosen’t mean they are wrong and we are right.
Religion is not the only way of living, sadly without proper enlightment; people always take religion into everything.
When we look at the western world, why can’t we look at the human rights that are allowed there, the law and order situation, the development (construction, technology, etc.). Why do we always associate western culture with bare naked bodies? There is so much to learn from them. And you know why the poster is nitpicking on those things? because as he came from abroad, he is used to that standard of living, and believe you me, the westerner have earned it.
I feel really sad when I read these comments, we have to understand that we have a lot of faults and religion is not the only way to rectify it. Common sense is….
I agree with Alam and Mr. Profanity… Made me laugh on a fucking Monday morning.
Neoka, pls grow up.. that’s the only thing I can say on your post… please get a life..
RUKN, very well said , 5/5.
Neoka, my goray friend,instead of complaining, you could give your suggestions to locals to improve various things in our society. You could guide uswhere we are lacking. How many locals did you educate in past 11 months? if None then I don’t think so you sound good to complain for little things.
You also become a ‘Pakistani’ who always whines and complain. Even our Pakistanis don’t complain much when they live in West, despite of they are offended everywhere by locals and authorities.
and one more thing to point out that the original poster was implying was the use of the common phrase that we hear everyday:
“Thats just the way things are…”
Suggesting, that nobody wants to take charge. And you know why that is? Its because those who even want to take charge are pulled down by others. That is why we have brain drain. There is only so much a person can take. I have seen countless examples of students returning from abroad to contribute, but when they see the situation in Pakistan, they run away again. Its a totally helpless situation, and unless they are willing to sacrifice themselves and their families, nobody will even think about coming back. And even when they do sacrifice themselves, there is hardly a difference made in the overall context. So why is that the hardworking and morally correct people should sacrifice themselves while unmoral and corrupt people prevail.
dude KARMAN that is the whole point here , the OP is implying that is the way things are when it is not the case, is it that hard for you to identify that someone was actually following policies and rules, as the OP mentioned. Its not the way things are, its the way things should be. your philosophy about taking charge is quite irrelevant here.
And you guys think we should look at the western world ,
“human rights that are allowed there, the law and order situation, the development (construction, technology, etc.)honesty, integrity, proper work ethics, social graces and good manners, civic sense and yes, good customer service ”
as i said , we have alot of ground to cover and we are very young to be compared. and with all these positives come by products like guantanamo, savage nuclear strikes on defenceless countries, severe phsycological problems within the society. so what if people are ‘honest’ and well mannered, they have no power over their government, or their army. i guess in that way we are quite similar, so you’d be happy.
why we bring religion into everything, if you were
‘enlightenend’ enough to ever read the Quran, you would know that it guides us in all those matters you mentioned above. Extremism is just a small part of our society, the larger part that is more dangerous to the country as a whole is people like you, the ignorant.
We dont have to emulate the west to be successful, that is not the only defined path. You guys are just too inspired by them , you choose to ignore the negatives of their society. for people like you, if you can’t help the country dont try to fake concern, we dont need people who cant even figure out their real identity. ‘Dhobi ka kutta……’
KARACHI The Megapolis of Pakistan
We live here, we are happy here, we will survive here and we are committed to the betterment and improvment, and yes we are working striving hard for it, though the progress seems little slow.
Those who are not happy, may leave. BUT STOP whinnnnnnning, STOP it, excercise your choice to leave the place or else start correcting yourself and see the difference.
Complaining and crying won’t help.
@rukun
‘Dhobi ka kutta……’
you can complete that sentence if you want to. Its not that you just didn’t make it clear what you thought of ‘enlightened’ people. I know my identity and have very strong values and beliefs. And its not important for me to be accepted by one group of a society to feel important.
“We dont have to emulate the west to be successful, that is not the only defined path. You guys are just too inspired by them , you choose to ignore the negatives of their society.”
And where did I say that we should emulate the west? I don’t think that everything they do is right. They have a lot of evil as well. But they have a lot of good things as well, and they outweigh the cons.
And how can you say that I didn’t try helping the country? Do you know me personally or Do you know what I have done, or what I have tried to do? Only to face corruption, misdealings, lies and deceit, when I was trying to take my best step forward and do something for the country.
I know what is right and what is wrong by just studying how the world functions. Every religion says to be good to humanity and that is what I believe in.
But you know what? Its useless. I don’t want to change your thinking. If you think studying the Quran will lead you to the righteous path, its wonderful. But don’t try to make others follow it, just because you think its right and the only way.
What it boils down to are the basics, which every religion preaches, and sadly that is what is missing from our society, and where the western world has cashed in.
Adnan, I can speak for the people in the USA, where I live and I can tell you that the people learn these values mainly at home and at school. When children have chores at home, when they have jobs as teenagers, and they are expected to work hard and honestly,they learn responsibility and honesty. As far as religion goes, let me tell you I have friends, extremly decent people with all these values , who do not believe in any religion.
“What it boils down to are the basics, which every religion preaches, and sadly that is what is missing from our society, and where the western world has cashed in.”
VERY TRUE.
Being a good human being is not the prerogative of any single religion but a basic value system incorporated in all. If we all just aimed to be better people, as opposed to better muslims/christians/jews/etc, the world would be a better place.
No need to take it personal, you may be an exception but most people aren’t.And i never meant to judge anyone personally, we are talking about a group of people with similar thought here.
you may think that the pros of the western society may out weigh the cons, but its just you, we may not share our preferences. In fact we as an eastern society should have completely different preferences, learning from some one is good, copying them may not be as clever as it seems.
Every religion does preach similar basic actions, we are blessed with a detailed description in the for the of the Quran. I dont want anyone to be forced to follow it. I dont ‘think’ the Quran is right, I know that it is, and alot of people around the globe accept that, regardless of religious affiliations.
All i say is that if we can say that we should look at the pros of the west and try to change our selves because it is successful, why cant we look at the teachings of the Quran because it too guarantees worldly success with the bonus of a better after life, its just a matter of realizing the effectiveness of its teachings.
And If we have been mistreated by our country, we shouldn’t loose hope because it is after all our own homeland, we have to keep on trying and eventually we will be successful.
the OP’s post mentions implementation of policies and laws, though in selected places, it is a first isnt it.
This is absurd how people have jumped at the blogger for highlighting an attitude that is prevalent among Pakistani businesses. In the evil west, any restaurant would go out of their way to cater to a customer and keep them happy and satisfied. If these folks at this KFC had any sense they would have given the customer a half-and-half order of both fries at regular price and that would be the end. Condiments like mayo and ketchup are offered free around the world. Or charge a couple of bucks. Use common sense.
As for the lower class fundoo types who think every complaint is an attack on islam and an opportunity to spread their religious belief and attack modernity, what would the koran say about solving such customer care issues. Being that it is a complete way of life I would appreciate specific verses and hadees. But I know there is no mention of customer care in there. You will have to make the decision on the spot according to your understanding of the principles of a religion that stresses the rights of fellow humans above the rights of god. A customer would have to be respectful and realistic in their expectations of service, and our blogger here said he recognised the reasons behind those policies just didn’t agree with them. A business would treat customers with honesty, and respect, and go out of their way to make the experience a pleasureable one. Happy people make for a happy god.
@ Rukun
its just a conflict of opinion and I don’t think we both are wrong in our own perspectives.
You can follow the Quran and I will follow what I feel is right. I am sure there is a lot of common ground there. Though life experiences might have given it a different perspective, and that we are all entitled to.
I hope that you get enough courage and determination to do something positive for Pakistan. Good riddance
Orignal,sorry friend you didn’t understand what I asked. Leave it :-) I don’t want to argue as I am also planning to join PPH’s ‘No argument movement’. Yes, If you understand the reason of imposing religion at diffeent times then you might understand what I was talking about. Peace.
@ Alibhae the Quran and Hadees do tell us about business dealings and customer treatment in trade, I’ll leave you to find specifics out, if you are interested enough.
‘As for the lower class fundoo types who think every complaint is an attack on islam and an opportunity to spread their religious belief and attack modernity’
dude read the earlier posts, where the fuck did any one say that such complaints are an attack. What is being implied here is that such complaints are pointless in a developing country like pakistan. Are you sure its modernism being attacked? cauz i really think its actually wannabeism. like it or not even modernism has to have some limits, thats what every one with the slightest knowledge and belief in religion says.dont talk about things you don’t even have an idea about.
@ Kamran eventually you will realise the importance of religion, for that matter every one will, if not in this life then in the Hereafter. what i will do for the country in the future, I dont know. But i do know that I wont be prejudiced because some one mistreated me. Its all about the principles. ” Burdbaari”
JEZZ!! First up, everyone here commenting just needs to lighten up.
That was actually a fun read. Currently, I’m in Singapore and if there ever was a society more grounded in rules and norms, its this place (well, except maybe for Japan). Like the other day I saw a real sign at a beach, before a few coconut tree’s, which read: “No trespassing due to falling coconuts because of lightening”.
My point is, yea, in Karachi, you learn to live within or twist rules around to get what you want. And sometimes I actually appreciate that cause it brings order to things. But then, at times, it can be pretty infuriating (try to get into Park Towers to hit Liberty books on a sunday – family day!)
well i wudnt say ne thin bout the actual post as a lot has been added already
@LIES
a book lover.. are you?
well u know wht u can actually go inside, i v done it and so can u
and thats only bcz its our very own kara-city
i wont actually type how i did it here cuz then i might not be able to make it next time ;)
but to be honest when there is a a will, there is a way
Your friend’s excuse ( rgd shara-e-faisal ) incident is ridiculous and accepting such lame excuse is even further. I can give you several good reasons to commit a crime , will you accept that crime for such reasons? Crime is crime, no excuses!
As for the cineplex, these people are out of their mind. No words for them..
I recently moved to Pakistan as well I feal excatly the same………. no one seems to understand me :(
@ Kamran eventually you will realise the importance of religion, for that matter every one will, if not in this life then in the Hereafter. what i will do for the country in the future, I dont know. But i do know that I wont be prejudiced because some one mistreated me. Its all about the principles. ” Burdbaari”
Rukun, you just reiterated the fact that i mentioned before. Why are you pointing it again that I am wrong because I don’t take religion as my code of life? That is the point I was trying to make and even after I tried my best to close that chapter you just opened it up again.
And at being mistreated by “some one”, come on, do you really think I got affected because some one mistreated me? Please lets leave it at that, cause I thought that you understood that we were coming from different perspectives and will respect that. Unfortunately, I was mistaken.
On the one hand neoka is totally right, if youve seen “blood diamond” that expression TIA (this is africa) that pretty much sums it up for us too.
On the other hand large coorporations in america also have a penchant for following rules blindly to the point of stupidity and so some of your lament is universal it just happens to be based in karachi.
Neoka,
Good work buddy.
The things you are discussing here are too above from average mind (no pun intended). You are right in reaching this conclusion. Most of the progressive thinkers have left the country in despair. Some of them wanted to return but it’s too much for some to reason on every petty issue. Have you ever tried paying waiter extra cash to get your order straight, trust me that will do a wonder. Just think it as an advance tip ;).
To All (who are saying Neoka to leave Karachi),
So much for tolerance and welcoming a nice guy. If you can’t make it to the foreign land it’s not his fault. He is giving an outsider view to simple issues like throwing away a trash on PUBLIC street. BTW which is a crime in most civilized countries. But none of us want to improve we just want to whine. We want clean streets but do not want to be any part of it as long as our car or home stays clean we fine.
excellent debate here,
and yes, to be honest, such menial matters have not affected my stay, nor cast a bad light on my experience here. as the saying goes “when in rome do as romans do”
My point was simple, in the case of cineplex, yes a policy is a policy, however is their room to question the policy? What are the steps to impact change if there are loop holes/weaknesses in the policy?
Re: fries, why was it debated with management, why weren’t the staff equip to make decisions? Does that reflect a culture where the CEO calls all the shots and everyone else just obeys? Is the only way to make social and financial advancement to ‘know somebody’? or can hard work and determination get you ahead?
@Neoka
Cineplex policy is there for a very good reason, which you yourself explained. As for bending the policy when it seems ok to do so, well the guy did let you in, so i guess its ok.
As for the Area 51, I am sorry to say the waiters there can be a bit stupid at times. there are ways to get around them and I guess you see ppl like this in every society.
wow..I’m amazed at the viciousness of of some of these replies. I think in order for Pakistan to grow as a society we should be tolerant enough to listen and respond appropriately to viewpoints we might not necessarily agree with. There’s no need to attack each other so harshly.
HUM USS DESH KAY BASSI HAIN JAHAN mayo ka sachet…sirf paanch rupees(Rs 05-15/-only) ka ata hai…aur masala dahi barey kay saath freeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!
Re: fries, why was it debated with management, why weren’t the staff equip to make decisions? Does that reflect a culture where the CEO calls all the shots and everyone else just obeys? Is the only way to make social and financial advancement to ‘know somebody’? or can hard work and determination get you ahead?
Noeka, Not that I disagree with you but this is a common practice every where from Bank of America to Radio Shack to Subway. If you ask/cry for some thing that is not there, they always forward you to their supervisors.
@ Rukun:
I have some homework for you.
1. What is the concept of “service” in Islam, and
2. What exactly is termed “half the faith?”
3. With your great love (and, one assumes, knowledge) of “religion” what lesson about “law” can you derive from this well-documented episode from the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him’s life:
A man came to the Prophet and admitted he broke his fast. The Prophet asked, “Can you free a slave?”
The man replied it was beyond his means.
“Can you feed 60 hungry people?”
“No,” he replied, “I cannot so afford.”
“Can you keep 60 consecutive fasts?” The Prophet inquired.
“I cannot bear that.”
“OK, sit here.” The Prophet commanded, and they both sat and waited. A man came shortly with dates (or some other food.)
The Prophet asked the fast-violater to take the dates and feed them to the hungry and the poor of the city Madina.
“Truly, O Prophet! There is none poorer and hungrier than I between the two corner of Madina!” The man replied.
At which the Prophet peace be upon him smiled, and asked him to take the food and feed it to himself and his family.
++++
Dude, know your “religion” before using it as an excuse to do the very thing it forbids: poor service, lack of trust and delegation, filth and garbage, not using one’s brain, and twisting the rules.
One wonders at the mental compartmentalization of the Cineplex manager who let the blogger in with a couple (knowing full well he wasn’t with them – and look at this: unleashing a possibly dangerous young man on an innocent couple), but not otherwise! Reminds me of a recent story in papers. Jewish women in Israel, following the command of G-d to the letter of covering and not revealing their hair, use Indian wigs on top of their “real hair!” The story was about the shortage of such wigs, which was troublesome to the law-abiding (who are you kidding!?) orthodox women.
Wow!
Khuda bhi mil gaya, visaal-e-sanam bhi ho gaya!
++++
Bonus questions for anyone who wants to try:
1. Is the purpose of a restaurant to entertain & give comfort, and satisfy the taste/food needs? Or is it to “enforce policy?”
2. What is the value of “small things?”
++++
Take the red pill, people, and get out of The Matrix of policy! Welcome to the real world! Where policies are made for humans, humans are not made for policies!
@ Rukun:
“Eastern values” are not to treat people badly and make excuses for slip-shoddy behavior. Quite the contrary, one must say.
Speaking of polarity:
“Allah is of the East, and the West.”
We cannot take it upon our shoulders to lock up Allah in a Pakistani restaurant and call the rest of Hu’s created world inherently evil and not worthy of being followed in respects where THEY are more Islamic than Muslims. Secondly, there are Muslims in the West too! Would you separate the issues first, and then think logically?
And what’s the connection between being in a 60-year old country, and being unable to serve mayo with fries or preventing oneself from making shamelessly tall excuses for littering? It takes like 60 second. Like, do we expect that in the 100-th year, Pakistan will grow a hand and slap us for being idiots?
So keen to follow implement the Quran? Start with this: “And cooperate with each other in good deeds, and do not cooperate in wrong deeds.”
How about that!?
and nothing…..