Last night when i was in gulshan sitting late night with friends we were discussing how the whole city seems a frustrated psycho mob. And yes politics had to be the center topic. Going for a change, i was searching for some serious jokes in newspapers this morning and here i found one (”The minister assured the governor that the water and power secretary would be in Karachi on Monday and take steps to improve the situation“). The minister hoping something even a prophet wouldnt commit. Because Prophets dont commit on abnormalities. Moving on, here is one MASTER JOKE i found from past. This post is just to share some such serious jokes about KHI in political context since i find there is hardly anything worth smile in this city these days. And the price hike in Ramazan was just the last nail in coffin we were waiting for.
NEWS, July 2005 :[ The water plants would also be installed in Karachi, said the president who was confident that the entire country would have safe water by 2007. He told the gathering that provision of electricity in all parts of the country by 2007 was among the government’s priorities . . ]
In coming days (weeks,months) i am very hopeful that the same statement will be repeated by Mr. Zardari (who is by the way much worried about Kashmir than Karachi these days) whenever he visits Karachi. The circus goes on and on . .

I was thinking what would become of Karachi and the green CNG rickshaws, (legacy of debunked General & President Musharraf) if Altaf Hussain, Pir of London, Imam of Mohajirs of Karachi, were to suddenly transform from being a leader of MQM into an erstwhile rickshawala.

First, he won’t get any license. PPP wants all Sindhis, mostly un-educated and belonging to interior, to do everything. From sweepers to customs officers at port, to PIA’s various GMs, and the President of the god-damn country.

If in case he gets the license, he will do lot of things.

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In a country where DICTATORs are treated as hero’s, and ironically by educated, you cannot expect much when you talk about accountability. A land where thugs become leaders, accountability is an alien specie. While Mr. Musharraf is playing golf and will soon prepare some lectures for his foreign tours and earn some dollars by selling his lie-crafted visions his democratic-child ZARDARI is all set to continue his left over work aka the promise-dodge-next policy. Had this been real, pakistan would be have been a different story altogether. In such dismay this is the maximum people on street could do to manage a smile.

Kids born today due to activities at Do Darya (two rivers, Phase 8, DHA) will surely be a living, futuristic legacy of Gen (r ) Musharraf’s rule.

How? Read below.

Musharraf once announced that women shall be equal to men and that they must receive similar respect as men get (which men, he never told us). Therefore, he announced his famous bill, called Women Bill. The bill was a landmark achievement in the face of strong opposition from mullahs and other tullahs of Parliament and Senate. It said, among other things, freedom of expression (sexual, religious, etc). And lo and behold, people were out dating, doing things, touching, touching more, doing more things, and as we shall know after 20 years, doing lot of things not included in the bill.

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I have a radical idea for Karachi and its citizens. For one, I think KESC is all crap now after Musharraf and company (specially his darling PM, Shaukat) sold this fine organization to a private company for peanuts. No external or internal audit reports have ever been shared with citizens who pay their blood to keep this outfit afloat. Yet it dismisses us all like we are beggars. So, ladies and gentlemen of Karachi, should be burn down KESC? I am sure we should. It is of no use; it fleeces honest men and provides electricity free of cost to VVIPs, VIPs, brothers and sisters of PM; it also does not help when it fails to dis-connect illegal connections; and since last two nights I and my family and millions of others have not slept well. Karachi is in crises and we need someone else to bring us electricity.

By the way, which should be the first KESC office to go down?

The purpose of city nazim Mustafa Kamal’s on-going trip to the United States has been the subject of much discussion lately. All three major English dailies, Dawn, The News and Daily Times have carried stories on it recently.

On Monday, Daily Times reported he was getting “special treatment” from the State Department because they viewed him as a potential future leader of the country. The report in Monday’s The News was also on similar lines, it quoted CNN’s State Department Correspondent Zain Virje as saying that the mayor of Karachi was a “guest with a mission”. Daily Times also published the full transcript of the interview Kamal gave to Virje, and even though Kamal played down speculation about the purpose of his visit, telling Dawn’s Anwer Iqbal that he had come to the United States to urge American businessmen to invest in his city, speculation is still rife. Read more

The May 18 Memorial Foundation in Gwangju, Korea proclaimed Mr. Muneer A. Malik a Karachi based practicing lawyer as the winner for the 2008 Gwangju Prize for Human Rights and the award will be conferred to Mr. Muneer A. Malik on May 18th 2008 in a ceremony to commemorate the May 18 Gwangju Democratic Uprising (Wikipedia: Gwangju Massacre) The prize award includes a gold medal, a certificate of achievement and US $ 50,000.00.

Mr. Muneer A. Malik was the former President of the Supreme Court Bar Association who has played an enormous role in the struggle of the lawyers, judges and the rest of the citizens of Pakistan for the independence of the judiciary. Under his leadership he was able to mobilize lawyers and the people to fight the repression imposed by President Musharraf when he declared an emergency and ousted several chief justices and judges. In the 1980’s Mr. Malik had been in the forefront of the struggle against the military rule of then President Zia Ul Haq. Mr. Malik was recipient of the 2006 Dorab Patel Award given by the Human Rights Commission of Pakistan.

The Gwangju Prize for Human Rights is an award given to individuals, groups or institutions in Korea and abroad that have contributed in promoting and advancing human rights, democracy and peace in their work. The award is given by the Gwangju people in the spirit of solidarity and gratitude from those whom they have received help in their struggle for democratization and search for truth.

Links: 518 International Solidarity Blog | 5-18 Memorial Foundation | Teeth Maestro

For those who lived in Karachi in the mid-1990s or have heard the stories from that time, the idea of re-visiting the state policy against the MQM is horrifying. Whatever hits the Haqiqi or the Mutthaida take, it’s the denizens of this city who will bear the brunt of it:

The government has decided to take strict measures for maintaining law and order in Karachi and averting the incidents like the ones that occurred on May 12 last year and earlier this month, The News learnt here on Monday.

“The government has decided to allow the Mohajir Qaumi Movement-Haqiqi to resume its political activities,” highly reliable sources in the ruling coalition said on condition of anonymity. “The Haqiqi group had been pushed to the wall under the Musharraf regime,” they said.

The sources said the government has decided to release Afaq Ahmed and Amir Khan of the Haqiqi group. They said the Sindh government has decided to review the cases instituted against the two top Haqiqi leaders and they would be exenorated in the cases where their involvement could not be proved.

(The News.)

My previous post “Terror sets in” triggered numerous comments, mostly directed towards the good that our current state of affairs hold for them. The number of comments, and the repeated emphasis on my perspective only compels me to write this open response to all the commentors.

Before I begin, I must say that I am not a political analyst of any sort, nor am I cunning enough to understand any underlying motive of any establishment, be it in power or opposition. My opinions are purely from an average ordinary joe perspective, that represent more than 70% of this country’s population. Also, since the commentors have luxuriously used the names of our rulers, please allow me to do the same.

Our nation does not hold many choices when it comes to running the country. We have seen our situation go from bad to worse under different governments. As a child, I was as naive as most of our nation today, and was an ardent fan of Altaf Hussain, with a poster in my bedroom and a firm belief that he is the all-good in our country. I would snap at anyone who criticized ‘Altaf bhai’. But like I said, I was stupid! Till very late, I couldn’t see the extent of evil that man is. How ordinary people have to bear the expense of his frivolity in maintaining his so-called ‘life as a political refugee’!

Half the country sings carols for BB, to the extent of almost sainthood. My family took a direct hit during her government in the early 90s when my father, a very senior executive at the Pakistan Steel Mills, refused to sign off a payment cheque which had a pre-decided cut for the party in government. He, along with 5 other officials, was sacked overnight, after a series of threats. Some of those officials could not take the shock and died, leaving behind growing children with no bread-earners. Luckily, my mother was a working lady and we survived well. The incident however, did alter our educational opportunities. I’m sure there are others whose tales will shadow mine; our country has suffered tremendously due to her and Zardari and yet today, we are saying cheers to the very man who we called “Mr. 10%” and who became the 1st suspect in our minds when BB was assassinated. Are we not worse than them?

Onto Nawaz Sharif, oh well, we all know the various stories and projects to rob the country of whatever remained. Those who call the Zia’s regime as the worst era in Pakistan’s history, please note that Nawaz Sharif noted General Zia as his political mentor! There was however, 1 good that came out of his government, the nuclear tests! However, the famous 13th and 14th amendments clearly signify his never-ending thirst of power with no barring on any of his schemes. For the record, he was officially sentenced to 14 years imprisonment for corruption and tax evasion charges. The ‎Accountability Court of Pakistan has also disqualified him from holding any public office for 21 ‎years, and fined him 20 million rupees.

To reiterate here, I look at what these governments have given to ordinary citizens. At the end of the day, you and I have the same demands of security, human rights, affordability of basic necessities, and of course, prosperity.

Onward to Musharraf, the Martial Law that I have experienced enough to remember. Although many challenge that his term has been more corrupt than anyone else, the common man has seen atleast some good out of it in the form of economic growth, foreign investments bringing more facilities to Pakistan, better road conditions etc. I donot entirely disagree with the fact that Musharraf’s rule has been corrupt, much like the previous governments.

I think most of the commentors have taken my post to be pro Musharraf. Let me clear a few points here.

As a nation, we have lost all the civic sense we had, we have lost regard to law, regard to the rights of others, and any spirit to become a part of any struggle for improvement. As a nation, we are spoilt brats to the point that we need a stick to discipline us! we have lost the right to deserve democracy!

If I were to change my initial post any bit, it would be that we need a Kingdom system in our country. That way, even if the heads of the state eat off the national treasury, it would be only a matter of time till they realize that there’s no way out than to work for Pakistan! Sadly, that can only remain a dream!

Call it Martial Law, call it whatever you want, but eradicate the plague of the current lot of politicians, make the law and order enforcing agencies strict, execute a couple of terrorists in public and I’ll see how it doesn’t scare the Sh** out of everyone and reduce the crime rate!

70% of our population lives under some kind of fuedal setting. That’s what they know, that’s what they believe in, and that’s what they’re going to elect!

You cannot empower the nation until they know the difference between good and evil.

I end my post with an open prayer for prosperity of Pakistan!

Almost 2 years back i wrote this on KMB & i didn’t know i had to repeat something similar in 2008, that the DONKEY example still holds relevance.

First of all thanks to Cowasjee (not updated yet on DAWN website) & Mr. Mansoor (KHI) & JC (Express, Feb 26) for addressing this issue in papers. I always wonder if our print/electronic media had not been highlighting issues (especially their role in recent times) we were doomed to be lost with available leadership. In the midst of BIG political battle these issues seem so minor but this is where the mistake lies.

While the social divide keeps on increasing alarmingly & just yesterday an inevitable increase was gifted in oil/diesel price our dear PM Mr. Soomro (interim gift by Mr. Musharraf who has been expert in bestowing us with thieves for 8 years & whose eyes were too weak to find a person sympathetic to people & their miseries from 170 million souls) has finally decided to make the most of limited time he has. After knowing our earlier masters had left no blood to suck from its people earlier he has now decided to go for the bones.

The chaudhries are in Karachi & are(will) try(ing) to persuade MQM on their side but will MQM learn some lessons from past & try to form a coalition with PPP for the betterment of this city. While make/break continues in political circles i just wonder if anyone (MQM/PPP in Karachi’s case) really gives two hoots to such an injustice to the exchequer with public money? Will MQM/PPP now do an ehtijaaj on this plundering (couldn’t find an advance version of this word) when there is no daal,roti,makaan,aata,tail,cheeni & inflation is in double digits?

Will Mr. Soomro follow just 1% of his own words delivered few months back if he really knowns the definition of corruption, as, once again, ironically, he is an highly educated professional. And will someone convey this message to him?

[image :fahimsiddiqi ]