Should public toilets charge fee for using the service?

Whats the trend all over the world? Where its charged and where its free. I have no clue but i readers input could be valuable.

68 Comments so far

  1. balma on October 31st, 2008 @ 6:35 pm

    *You may not be aware but I know it for a fact that even if you have had taken a shower you still have to go through the ritual of vazoo at the end of it to qualify to say your prayers.

    Actually, I have read this. What can I do if the ummat (sorry, ummah) is stupid?

    Vakeel Saheb.
    thanks. Contact noted.

  2. barristerakc on October 31st, 2008 @ 7:04 pm

    Kabirdas, it’s best to ignore Tariq Khanani – let him die his own death!

    Balma / Kabir ,

    Speaking of Vazu – Molana Sexy Sam aka Sami-ul-Haq in a wedding dinner of another mate who father head his faction of party in Sindh in a very casual discussion about sex – mentioned, “beta always have sex in a vazu” LOL

    And since we are talking about real-life experiences allow me to take the liberty and mention couple of real-life fu** ups!

    During the second tenure of Nawaz Sharif – he send a high level delegation to meet the infamous Cowasjee to influence his writings and all under the leadership of Shabaz Sharif.

    Shabaz Sharif was trying to convince Cowasjee about how his brother’s government is taking steps to improve Pakistan and every time he made a point the other two with Shebaz Sharif (Mushaid Hussain Syed and Mamnoon Hussein) used to smake the dinner table as if it’s the parliament desk.

    In the end – Shabaz Asks Cowasjee as what’s the first thing he would like to suggest the new government.


  3. barristerakc on October 31st, 2008 @ 7:14 pm

    Riaz Khokar was out ambassador during the Kargil War in Washington and when Nawaz Sharif was in meeting with President Clinton in the Oval Office –

    Riaz Khokar, Our Military Secretary, First Secretary and Begum Kulsoom were sitting out-side – RK/MS/FS were very tensed and embarrassed as the army asked the prime minister to give them atleast two weeks and delay the process – they were very tense.

    And then emerges our Prime Minister literally jumping and have a huge smile on his face and instead of saying something else –


    The on the same trip Nawaz Sharif was at JFK and requests Riaz Khokar to delay the flight – sitting in a plane costing atleast $10K-12K loss – Nawaz Sharif wanted to wait for this person who was coming – Riaz Khokar was thinking that this must be a very important person.

    Then this person came-in running in a mad rush after 40-50 minutes holding couple of big bags with American Security and Riaz the ever curious looked at the person giving the bags to Nawaz Sharif and to his surprise – the bags was filled up with ALOOO AUR GOBEE KAY PARATHAY instead of the files N.S mentioned it to Riaz.

  4. kabirdas on October 31st, 2008 @ 9:23 pm

    @ barristerakc on October 31st.

    I am grateful to you for giving your email address. Will get back to you on the address provided. Now that you have related some good real life jokes hear this one on the subject under discussion:


    I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: " Hi, how are you?"
    I am not the type to start a conversation in the men’s rest room but I don’t know what got into me, so I answered somewhat embarrassed: " Doin just fine!"
    And the other guy says: "So what are you up to?"
    What kind of question is that? At that time I am thinking this is too bizarre so I say: " Uhhh, I am like you travelling !"
    At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question: "Can I come over?"
    OK, this is just too weird for me but I figure I could be polite and end the conversation so I say: " No, —-I am a little busy right now!!!"
    Then I hear the guy say: " Listen, I will have to call you back. There is an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions !!!"

  5. kabirdas on October 31st, 2008 @ 9:36 pm

    @ barristerakc on October 31st.
    " Kabirdas, it’s best to ignore Tariq Khanani – let him die his own death!"

    I can’t. I love such guys. They add colour to life which at times tends to become bit dreary. Let him say what he wants to say and let him hear what he may not want to hear. Long live Tarq Khanani.

  6. barristerakc on November 1st, 2008 @ 1:23 am

    kabirdas- LOL as it goes, "you really saved your arse"…

    reminds me of those DESI-BABA STORIES YEARS!!!!! LOL

  7. barristerakc on November 1st, 2008 @ 1:24 am

    btw, I thought Khananis are sensible and one of us since when they started to have a rotten egg? like Tariq? anyways, for the sake of Kabir – we all love you!

  8. balma on November 1st, 2008 @ 9:21 am

    Vakeel Saheb,

    That stupid fake maulana actually made sense a little bit. I never go close to any pretty woman without cleaning up first. Call me naazuk-mizaaj or whatever, I always want to be clean when being intimate with a woman. Doing vazu is a good first step toward cleaning ….again, if you were fixing your car first make sure you do vazu (at least) before having sex. Muslims’ tragedy: mix religion in every thing. Otherwise the buDDhaa khoosat fraudiya could have just said "baiTaa be clean when having sex"!

  9. kabirdas on November 1st, 2008 @ 3:49 pm

    @ balma on November 1st, 2008 @ 9:21 am

    Balma Ustad:
    After reading you referenced post I think you are not much of an Ustad and an Alam-e-Din as as I thought you would be. This is evident from your statement whereby you say that you always do vazoo before you are due to meet some lady.

    If you were an Aalam-e-Din you would have known all the dos and don’ts of vazoo which are numerous falling in various categories. Following them is a big hassle and not worth it even if the girl happens to be very pretty one unless of course the girl wears a Hijab and meeting in a state of vazoo is her condition. You should also know that vazoo is a fagile kind of thing which can break very eazily. So by the time you get close to your object of desire you may well not be in astate of vazoo. So under such circumstances your doing vazoo to meet a pretty girls shows you don’t know much abou the intricasies of vazoo (on which I throw some light in a short while) and as such not much of an Aalam-e-Din:-)

    Now if you were an Ustad you would take a shower before meeting the girl waiting for you and not a vazoo. Thats what I would do though I don’t claim to be an Ustad.

    So my advice to you would be to take a shower rather than doing vazoo befor your date. It is hassle free and not liable to go awry.

    I recently picked up a booklet titled ‘Masnoon DuaieN’ from road side book stall for Rs 10 which enumerates scores of DuaieN for all ocassion. These DuaieNs have been compiled afte great deal of research by Hazrat Moulana Ashiq Ilahi Sahib Buland Shahri. I will discuss couple of these DuaieN in my next post. Here I just want to tell you that this booklet also gives all the dos and don’ts of vazoo.

    Since these dos and don’ts are in Urdu I will just enumerate their headings and number in English for your info:

    Vazoo kay farz: 4 in number.
    Vazoo ki sunataiN: 13 in number.
    Vazoo kay mustahab: 5 in nuber.
    Makroohat-e-vazoo: 4 in number.
    Nawakaz vazoo (things which break vazoo): 8 innumber.

    Now sir, choice is yours if you will take a shower or do a vazoo before going to see your sweet heart.

    You know it was because of these kind of restrictions and demands that I gave up vazoo for any thing. Reminds me of William Charles (WC :-)) Filed who once said: When I read the evils of drinking I gave up reading.

  10. barristerakc on November 1st, 2008 @ 5:33 pm

    @balma – as it goes, unhygienic punani’s are a big turn-off…!!! My experience of having the pleasure to check the hygiene status of most of the birds- I found the south-American (Peru) chicks to be the dirtiest and Orientals close to perfection when it comes to hygiene.

    Wasay Balma (GURU – may peace be upon you) a question: do we have to offer NAMAZ-e-SHUKRANA after a sexual intercourse? LOL

    Kabirdas – prorably you picked up the infamous “MAUT KA MANZAR” instead of “VAZU KAY FAZA-IL” by Maulana Sami ul Haq – kindly, keep an eye on Sexy Sam’s aka Maulana Sami’s “HOW TO HAVE SEX – DEOBANDI WAY” manuals – I will pay anything for that for the laugh off it.

    Sanghar happens to be San-Francisco of Sindh – famous/infamous for two things – homosexuality and animal abuse aka beastuality.

    Some years back three-four friend there on a “HUNTING TRIP” and apparently were not lucky to get any of the birds so they retreated to this restuarent disgusted and hungry. They ate like panjus and when they asked for the bill –

    The waiter said, “Saab App Ka Bill Paid Hai”

    Upon enquiry the waiter pointed his fingers to the man who paid the bill – the man was a typical Sindhi with big mustaches wearing a Sindhi cap reading newspaper with sun-glasses.

    The lads went up to him and asked,

    “Sir app nay humara bill kyoon diya?”

    The Sindhi Man Replied,

    “Saa’iii humay Khoobsorati ke Qadar hai” with a grin

    The lads never went to Sanghar back and considered themselves lucky to be alive!

  11. kabirdas on November 1st, 2008 @ 6:42 pm

    @ barristerakc on November 1st, 2008 @ 5:33 pm

    Sanghar may well be the SF of Sindh but I am told Bunoo is the SF of Pakisatan. I am told there a crow also flies with one wing—-with other wing it keeps its vunerable part of anatomy covered.

    In Bunoo once someone asked a local why do you have sex with boys when you have women to have sex with. The guy replied with the most logical counter question: Why do you eat fruit when you have bread to eat????

    Thanks for providing the info about the books to read.

    By the way never heard of this word ‘punani’. What does it mean? Request educate.

  12. kabirdas on November 1st, 2008 @ 6:53 pm

    Just one more (not last) question. At the proposed ‘gathering of the eagles’ (get together)would the eagle be required to come Bavazoo or Baywazoo:-). I reckon Balma may be the right person to decide about it. He seems to know the advantages of vazoo versus shower;-)

  13. balma on November 1st, 2008 @ 9:21 pm

    Guys, you missed the point. All what I said was that fraudia fake Mullah Sami should have advised young men to be clean when going for ibaadat (ibadah for idiots)
    Khoobsoorat aurat say milnaa bhee ibaadat hae!

    We should not use the term maulana for assholes like fazlu and sammu.
    They are jerks. Maulana is for people like Zafar Ali Khan (zamindar newspaper), Muhammad Ali Jauhar (Aligarh and Oxford grad). Yeh galee-mohallay keh jaali madarso’n kay paRhay huay Maulana-allama nahi’n, yeh niray mullay hai’n. Jaahil kee aulaads!
    Allama Iqbal allamah thaa, phd in philosophy…allamah mashriqi allamah thaa, maths expert from cambridge.
    Lets not dilute our language by calling every jahil a maulana or allamah.
    We have a word for such idiots: Mullah.

    Gathering of eagles: I am always in the state of vazoo. I am always clean and as I said, jin cheezo’n say vaszoo toottaa hae, vazoo karnay say voh chezai’n jooRtee nahi’n!

  14. kabirdas on November 1st, 2008 @ 10:43 pm

    @ balma on November 1st, 2008 @ 9:21 am
    " Muslims’ tragedy: mix religion in every thing"

    Recently my curiosity got better of me and I purchased a booklet from a road side book shop costing Rs10/. It is titled Masnoon DuaiN and has been copiled by Hazrat Maulana Ashaq Illahi Sahib Buland Shahri according to him after lot of painstaking research.
    There are altogether 157 DuaiN for all ocassions in this booklet. When I say all ocassions I mean all ocassions. Some of such Duas for special ocassions of which you may not be aware of are as follows:

    1. Dua to be recited before the sexual intercourse with wife.

    Translation : I start this job with the name of Allah. Oh, Allah save us from Satan and also keep the Satan at a distance from the child that you give us.

    a. The Satan will never be able to harm the child that will be borne as a result of this copulation performed after reciting this Dua—–(Bukhari and Muslim).

    b. This Dua must be recited since by not taking Allah’s name before copulation Satan’s sperm also gets in alongwith the sperm of the man—–(Muzahir Huq)

    [It is not clear if this Dua is to be recited if the copulation is not performed with a view to procreate or when one is using a condom]

    2. Dua to be recited during ejaculation.

    Translation : Oh Allah don’t give anything to the Satan out of the child that you give me.

    [Full marks to those who can remember to recite this or anyother Dua for that matter when ejaculating.]

    3. Dua to be recited when a woman after Nikah or when an an animal is purchased.

    Oh Allah, I ask you for its welfare and the goodness of its conduct and habits and I seek your protection from its mischief and the mischief of its conduct and habits.

    After reciting this Dua one should pray for Barkat while holding the hair of the wife and if a camel has been purchased then it should be recited while holding the hump of the camel from the top——–(Mashkoh Sharif)

    [The purpose of bringing home an animal or a wife seems to have some commonality]

    4. Dua to be recited when dressing up.

    Translation: All praise be to Allah who gave me this dress without my effort or power.

    By reciting this Dua after dressing up all past and future sins are forgiven—–(Mashkoh)

    [This is the kind of Dua I was looking for yani Haldi bhee na lagay aur rang be chokha aay. Now no body can have an excuse for not qualifying for Jannat]

    NB: There are some other interesting Duas also in this collection which I would not append here because of spacetime constraint.

  15. kabirdas on November 1st, 2008 @ 10:59 pm

    @ balma on November 1st, 2008 @ 9:21 pm

    Agree 100% with what you have said about these Mullahs who go by the name of Maulana these days. It irks me when I hear them collectively being referred to as Ulma-e-Karam. The other so called Maulanas may be just jahils but Fazloo beside being a Jahil is absolutely a characterless person. I would call him ‘Devil’s Deciple’.

    Well said : jin cheezo’n say vaszoo toottaa hae, vazoo karnay say voh chezai’n jooRtee nahi’n!. I really liked this!!

  16. barristerakc on November 2nd, 2008 @ 6:28 pm

    Yes, I agree – there’s a difference between a Mullah, Maulana and an Ulema. BTW, I was offered a short-cut PhD in Islamic Studies from Karachi University the other day as a reward for a “free-advice” which came in helpful for a friend’s father.

    Damn, I get to hear child-molesting cases from Molvis (if they really are one? To be tagged with the title) more and more now-adays!

    Kabir Mian,

    Dua to be recited during ejaculation? LOL ! how many duas did I miss?err!!!

    Recommend me a dua before having SEX? LOL

    I am with you for making Balma a Mufti – should I start a petition? (we have to buy a blood-proof car for Hazrat Balma since IUNKNOWN escaped from Red Mosque? Remember? He could explode anytime, any moment? )

  17. kabirdas on November 2nd, 2008 @ 9:51 pm

    @ barristerakc on November 2nd.

    1. Child molesting by Mullahs in their Hujras, Madrassas and while teaching Qurans is a common occurance. You know beside giving Aazan and leading prayers they have very little to do in life. With so much free time at their disposal and nothing else to do all they do is think about sex and put their thinking into practice whenever and however they can. Some time back I read a news item in an Urdu daily about a Mullah who got caught in his hujra having sex with a bitch. I liked the heading of this news which read as follows:
    Molvi Shahab Hujray MaiN Kuttia Ko Haq-e-Zojgi Datay Howay Pakray Gay

    2. I have already quoted a Dua before having sex with wife. I suppose you have asked one to be said before extramrital sex. I will have to do more research for this particular prayer. I am sure there will be such a Dua which they must have been using when having sex with Londis and Bandis. Ah, those were the days !!

    3. I can see Iunknowing is once again on the lose and gunning for Balma. We will have to protect Balma from this religous lunatic. Before making Balma a mufti we will have to find a suitable name for him like : Hazrat Maulana Balma Mufti Sahab Karachivi etc

  18. balma on November 3rd, 2008 @ 11:54 pm

    I hate to be defending religion, but because someone has too much free time to frame dua’s for almost every occasion is no fault of a religion.
    It is because of these stupid ahaadees that people like wahab in arabia decided to clean up the system. That led to another type of fanaticism, but that is a different story.
    Camel and aurat, only stupid people can come up with such things. abay, kabhi oo’nt kee aankh may bhee khumaar dekhaa hai….satiyaanaas ho inn mulaao’n kaa!

    Dua for extramarital sex: yaa-illaahi meray gunaah-e-kabirah ko muaaf farma!

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